Author Johanne Brennan of the new book; “How to Thaw Your Frozen Feet” and I discuss the topic of her book, domestic violence and the way out. Johanne has created a 10 step process to escaping the trap of abuse. We discuss, how living in such abuse can lead to many other problems, PTSD, extreme depression, anxiety and panic attacks, and even poor physical health. Then, we discuss the healing process.
Michael A. gives an incredible account of going through 28 rehab programs in South Florida in a six year period. The ineffective system, which values a good medical insurance card over a patient’s wellbeing, could not help him to get clean. Finally, Michael found a program that worked for him. He discovered that he needed a lot more than a short term program that just meets the minimum requirements to operate. He found a place in California that had a better program. Five months of treatment, intense physical activity, team building, multiple forms of therapy are major components of this effective treatment program. You can learn more about the program and Michael’s story in his excellent article on the Recovering Addict Advice website: https://recoveringaddictadvice.com/addicted-to-rehab/. While the program he describes is one location that only serves men, I hope that this philosophy of truly helping people to overcome addiction will spread to more addiction treatment programs.
Much is said and written about narcissistic males. On this episode Dr. Paul Meier, Melanie Vann, and Kristin Walker do part I on narcissistic women!
Dr. Paul Meier is the founder of the multi-state, non-profit mental health outpatient organization Meier Clinics, a practicing psychiatrist, best-selling author, and international speaker.
Melanie Vann has her MA in Counseling Psychology. She is the Program Director for MHNR Network and host of Memoirs of Madness.
Kristin Sunanta Walker is the founder of MHNR Network and host of Mental Health News Radio.
Do you ever try to downplay your need for great self-care? If you’re like many folks–too many folks–you likely do! You may have been raised to believe that you should be ok, power through, and need nothing. You may have been told that other people are more important than you are, and that you are a good person when you put other people first…all the time! NO! Not good. Always putting yourself at the end of your list is DEFINITELY NOT GOOD! . You may well become a tired, isolated, worn down, and resentful person, though! That’s definitely not good. You see the pattern immediately, don’t you? You feel tired, and then, because a parent or someone told you that you should put other people first, you push yourself well beyond your limits. You “think you should!” ARGH! No, you shouldn’t. Sure, there are crises and you might have to push through, real emergencies. But, really, those are few and far between. Not much is a crisis or an emergency, but too many people live as though everything is. If you’re with, or were raised by, a Hijackal, that’s how they want you to think the world works. And, Hijackals® are absolutely delighted to create crisis and emergency, after disaster and destruction. Exhausting! Sounding familiar? I had to learn all this the hard way, too. You deserve to be healthy. That’s your job. Do it for yourself. I’m giving you lots of food for thought this week, and next week, I’ll add even more to help you think about how you really want to feel, think, live, and love.HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY’S EPISODE:Why you may not think you need to take good care of yourselfWhat does it really mean to be selfishWhy being selfish is not a bad thing when it comes to self-careMany questions to deeply think about, even journal about, to help you consider taking super good care of yourself in every wayI hope this help you see that more clearly. If you need help with this, I’m here for you.Let’s talk soon. I can help. Schedule an initial hour consultation HERE for only $97.I hope this empowers you to make positive changes NOW.Talk soon.RhobertaRhoberta Shaler, PhD,The Relationship Help DoctorForRelationshipHelp.comP.S. Subscribe to my newsletter, Tips for Relationships, HERE.WANT THE PRIVACY AND SAFETY OF MY SUPPORT GROUP AWAY FROM FACEBOOK?You can have that, and:access to a Emotional Savvy Circlemy 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy programmonthly “Ask Me Anything” callsYou can get most of this for the price of one latte a month!ForRelationshipHelp.com/ESCCONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: ForRelationshipHelp.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerYouTube: YouTube.com/ForRelationshipHelpYou can also listen to the last 32 episodes of Save Your Sanity on Mental Health News Radio Network. That’s a great place to get in-depth insights for shoring up mental and emotional health of all kinds.#Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulativepeople #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorders #stress #self-care #emotionaldistress
Rebuilding trust; once it’s broken it’s one of the most difficult things to heal. Trust is one of those things that can take quite a bit of bending before it actually breaks. We give others opportunity after opportunity to save it. We can endlessly justify what someone in our life did to us, and how they didn’t mean it, and how we shouldn’t be so selfish and quick to judge for any number of reasons. We even blame ourselves for all the seemingly bad things we’ve done, and figure “who are we cut someone off just because…”.
Yes, rebuilding trust in others is very difficult, but healing the trust in ourselves can prove to be more problematic. We are our own worse critic, right?
How could we let this happen, what were we thinking, we should have seen this coming…the list goes on and on of the words we tell ourselves to justify the emotional beating we feel is necessary. Blaming ourselves is always easier than blaming someone else, because we can control us…we can’t control others.
When your trust in a parent, sibling, or authority figure is broken when you’re a child, the road to healing is indeed rough but certainly not impossible. When that trust is broken again, as an adult survivor who is traumatized, everything comes rushing back to take it’s seemingly rightful place at the forefront of your very being. All that hard work you did to heal and work through these emotions, all the progress you made, can seem like a distant memory. You may very well be knocked down temporarily, knocked sideways, and stumble a bit but all that you’ve done is not undone…you have get back up, dust yourself off, and keep going.
My guest on this episode of the podcast, Joanne Cipressi, has done just that many times in her life and now works with survivors to help them heal and rebuild that trust.
As she outlines on her website: I have been a life coach for about 20 years. Between my upbringing, personal experiences, and my educational training, I have put together formulas for helping people retrain the way they think, feel and act so that they can achieve their goals. I have worked with people on so many different issues, problems and concerns over the past 20 years, that she truly understands what people need in so many areas of their life.
I have seen the transformation power that retraining the way you think and feel has. When you learn to make your mind and emotions work for you instead of against you, your life truly does transform. With deep care and love for people, I work from a place or understanding, compassion and intuitive guidance to move people to change.
Joanne is trained in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), Advanced Hypnosis, Age Regression Therapy, Timeline Therapy, Humanistic Neuro-Linguistic Psychology, Reiki-Master, and more. Using her skills and training, along with her personal experience as a survivor of both childhood and adult sexual abuse, she is able to help her clients through some of their most difficult circumstances a, transforming the way they think and feel about themselves, and embrace the progress of achieving their goals.
During our chat, Joanne and I discuss:
- Some of her survivor story, which includes sexual abuse by her step father when she was a child, as well as a sexual assault as an adult.
- Rebuilding trust in yourself, and others. The challenges and rewards of doing so, and why it’s so important and affects many aspects of our life.
- Overcoming thoughts of and a mindset of suicide after trauma.
- How and why she decided at 19, to become a coach and help others. A very interesting story which includes a conversation between two strangers that gave her the motivation she needed to make changes in her life.
- How Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) has helped her find breakthroughs in her own life and for her clients.
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