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Rescue Yourself from the Pernicious Shadow of the High Level Narcissist

Quote by Carl Jung  “Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser itis. At all counts, it forms an unconscious snag, thwarting our most well-meant intentions.”

Trapped in a marriage or partnership with a pernicious high level narcissist, an individual obsessed with self and public image with extreme self entitlement, very low conscience capacity, often an infant terrible with a dreadful temper that is projected out on to you behind closed doors. This is horrifying to the spouse or child of the high level narcissist. 

The  high level carries from within a primitive, seething Shadow that ejects venom in various forms on to you: false accusations, recriminations, incessant criticisms, withering projections that send you into the dark reaches of the fight or flight nervous system, the sympathetic mode. You are at the mercy of the narcissist’s rampant regressed Shadow. The opposite occurs in public with the high level who worships his image. Here there is a major shift—the look of the face, the eyes, the movements, pace, style are transformed. The narcissist, an incredible method actor lights up with this charismatic false self. He/she turns it on like a light switch, a transformation that is highly impressive. 

How much longer can you tolerate the scream fits, volleys of temper, scathing glances, belittlings that leave you psychologically and physically weakened. You don’t and never did deserve to be treated this way. 

Make a stand now for yourself. You deserve to be treated with respect and deference. 

With this opening, you belong to yourself again–spontaneity, joy, awe, beauty, solitude, independence of thought.

I want to share some thoughts about the Shadow with you. 

For tens of thousands of yeaars man has been dealing with his Shadow in a variety of ways. Going back to the dawn of time when man first walked the earth upright, he has been infused with the Shadow parts of himself found in the deep unconscious of his psyche. 

Today we are still facing our Shadows. As humans we carry the inheritance of our Shadow selves. Tis is not a curse but an incredible boon to those who seek wholeness, individuation and the promise and the fulfillment of one’s unique creativity. 

 

The Fear of All-Or-Nothing Thinking

Everything is a potential deal breaker when all-or-nothing thinking prevails! People who were raised in emotional abusive homes learn to think that way. If you are with one, you may be on the receiving end and need to understand and name it. You need to be able to do that. If you were raised by an emotionally abusive parent, you may have learned to use all-or-nothing thinking as a safety mechanism, or a defense mechanism. You didn’t choose it. You learned it. Now, it’s wise to have a look at the behavior and see if it is still required, and/or serving you well. Another name for black-or white- all-or-nothing thinking is “splitting.” Here’s a definition from Wikipedia: “a failure in thinking to bring together the dichotomy of both positive and negative qualities in self and others into a realistic, cohesive whole.” That means that you get caught in pairs of opposites, with no consideration of all the possibilities in between. That doesn’t leave many options, does it? Life is full of possibilities, changes, and growth points. When you–or someone you care about–gets stuck in all-or-nothing thinking, the richness is gone, and fear has replaced it. ?HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY’S EPISODE:How all-or-nothing thinking affects your inner dialogue, your self-talkThe definition of “splitting”Why there is focus on extremes in all-or-nothing, black-and-white thinkingHow all-or-nothing thinking reflects fear of shame, blame, and criticismSix fears that underlie black-or-white thinkingChronic stress, anxiety, and depression related to distorted thinking5 strategies to help you shift away from all-or-nothing thinking Now you can see why it is SO important to recognize this pattern. If it’s within you, you’ll want to change it. If it’s coming at you, understand it and make decisions about your relationship. I’m here to help.I wish you well.Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER…WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCASThttp://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOKhttps://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTERhttps://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDINhttps://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAMhttps://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTERESThttps://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp————————————————————-I‘M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT’S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler’s Support Community Save $24 on your first three months.———————————————————————-#allornothingthinking #blackorwhitethinking #crazy-making #livinginfearofshame #fearofshame #splitting #cognitivedistortion #seeingdownsidepotential #focusingonthenegative #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #emotionaltrauma #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #drshaler #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Gen-X Parents

Stigmas and stereotypes are surrounding every generation. We can look back and notice the differences in Boomers’ social culture, vs. Millennials, vs. Generation-I. But, what about parenting? 

Today I am joined by Dr. Louise Stranger to discuss who Generation-X are as parents and how we have raised Millenials.

“Sleeping with the Enemy: Narcissists and Cybersecurity” with Rick Jordan on Negotiate Your Best Life with Rebecca Zung #271

 Are you worried you might be a victim of a narcissist’s cybercrime?  Are they breaking into your computers or hacking into your email?  How do they track you or trace you?  What equipment can they use?   Rick Jordan, former CIA cybersecurity specialist is going into all of this in this episode including: 
– how to protect yourself from cyberhacking
– how to know if you’ve been hacked
– what to do about if you have been 
– everything narcissists and cybersecurity
 
More About Rick Jordan
Rick Jordan is one of America’s leading voices in the area of cybersecurity.  He uses a combination of CIA training, criminal psychology, and his technology and business experience to figure out how even the most manipulative minds operate.  He’s been featured in every major media outlet and in movies and documentaries and is the host of his own show, Rick Jordan TV. 
More about Rick right here:  https://www.rickjordan.tv
 
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GRAB YOUR FREE CRUSH MY NEGOTIATION PREP WORKSHEET RIGHT HERE! 
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Grab a copy of Rebecca’s book, Negotiate Like You M.A.T.T.E.R.: The Sure Fire Method to Step Up and Win (foreword written by Robert Shapiro).   It went straight to being a #1 bestseller the first day it was launched!  Find out what everyone is so excited about – get the book RIGHT HERE! 

To get your copy of Rebecca’s bestselling book, Breaking Free: A Step by Step Guide to Achieving Emotional, Physical and Spiritual Freedom, please visit the Amazon website to order it RIGHT HERE.   
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DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN LEGAL ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.

87: Eating Disorders in Pregnancy with Jaren Soloff, RD

In this podcast, you will learn:

> What is the most critical time for your baby to get the best nutrition for health and development?
> What are some of the triggers during pregnancy for binge eating disorder, emotional eating, and food addiction?
> How to nourish yourself during the fourth trimester.

Schedule a free consult to discuss your food and body image issues: https://findingyouranchor.as.me/CONSULT

The Biggest Wrestler EVERR!!! Franco Varga!! Why He Doesn't Want To Go To a Major Company??

Pro Wrestling Unraveled Interview with Franco Varga! This chat with him has nothing held back! Full of laughs and just a great time.

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Scott Schober — Expert in Online Scams

Scott Schober is the author of three best-selling security books including “Senior Cyber”. In the book, Scott and Craig Schober pick apart a multitude of cybersecurity scams that relate directly to the financial, socioeconomic, and health & well-being of all seniors by offering simple advice for all levels of cybersecurity experience for grandparents, grandchildren, and everyone in between. Find out more at ScottSchober.com.

Check out https://copenotes.com/zestful for an innovative app that supports mental health.

Find out more about the Zestful Aging Podcast at ZestfulAging.com.

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