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Anniversary Emotions and Illnesses Part 2 with Dr. Paul Meier

Join Dr. Paul Meier and Kristin for the second episode of anniversary emotions.

Notes from Dr. Paul Meier: NORMAL BRIEF GRIEF.

My father died many years ago and I was with him when he died talking to him and it was a wonderful experience even though sad to lose him. I have dealt with it well I believe. One Christmas Day a few years after his death, I was excited to go wake up our young kids to open presents and have an exciting day together, but then I felt suddenly sad for no apparent reason and couldn’t figure out why. I went into a room by myself and prayed for insight and immediately became aware that my parents always came at Christmas mornings to open presents with us. My Mom was still alive and would be there soon, but my Dad wouldn’t and I missed him. I actually encouraged myself to cry and did so for about two minutes and prayed that God would send an angel to give him a hug up in heaven and tell him we love him and miss him today. God would never say no to a request like that. Then I felt great again, having become aware of the reason and dealt with it. Feeling temporary brief dysthymia is not always a bad thing. It was a good thing in that circumstance and it might be for you in our listening family too.

REGRESSION = Lots of my clients who I have seen for med checks but brief therapy once every few months for 10-15 years have done great that long, but we all still have a tendency to REGRESS to some extent to seeing life and ourselves and our roles like we saw them in childhood when we visit parents and sibs on the holidays or other events (weddings, etc.) and then are surprised we may feel worse temporarily after the holiday and not even know why. I warn my clients as I see them in Nov and Dec to watch out for that and I explain this to them. That way they catch themselves and avoid it, or sometimes need to avoid obnoxious parents who are always verbally abusive. To feel guilty for staying out of contact or limiting contact with chronically abusive parents is false guilt. We should feel guilty if we subject ourselves and our families to that instead. “Honoring your father and mother” in the Bible doesn’t mean letting them dominate or abuse you. It might mean having no contact with them but pitching in financially with other sibs to help pay for a nursing home when they are old, or it may involve doing nothing but avoiding or assisting them altogether.
PTSD SYMPTOMS MAY OCCUR ANNUALLY EVEN WHEN GONE THE REST OF THE TIME. If there is a past traumatic event of any kind or even strong regret that has not been adequately dealt with, each year near that anniversary date any person might experience more anxiety and sadness and not know why. Even nightmares that are difficult to understand, or more sensitivity. A person MIGHT be aware of what it is and feel bad each year or MIGHT NOT even be aware of what it is. For example, people who believe abortion is OK for personal reasons often feel sad annually at the time it occurred, often unconsciously, and may even look around at kids of the age that child would be had he or she been born and have conscious or unconscious regrets or guilt feelings. This is part of what is known psychiatrically as POST-ABORTION SYNDROME.

UNRESOLVED GRIEF. Anniversaries of major losses, like death of a child or significant other. Broken relationships. Divorce is often more traumatic than the death of a beloved mate. It is a rude awakening that the mate was not who you thought he or she really was. It is a willful rejection of you rather than an unexpected death.

Anniversary Illnesses and Emotions Part I with Dr. Paul Meier

Join Dr. Paul and Kristin Walker talking about how certain times in our life that are stressful can show up later on. Dates of stressful events can leave us feeling a lot of anxiety and we don’t necessarily understand why. Episode 1 of 2!

Notes from Dr. Paul Meier: NORMAL BRIEF GRIEF.

My father died many years ago and I was with him when he died talking to him and it was a wonderful experience even though sad to lose him. I have dealt with it well I believe. One Christmas Day a few years after his death, I was excited to go wake up our young kids to open presents and have an exciting day together, but then I felt suddenly sad for no apparent reason and couldn’t figure out why. I went into a room by myself and prayed for insight and immediately became aware that my parents always came at Christmas mornings to open presents with us. My Mom was still alive and would be there soon, but my Dad wouldn’t and I missed him. I actually encouraged myself to cry and did so for about two minutes and prayed that God would send an angel to give him a hug up in heaven and tell him we love him and miss him today. God would never say no to a request like that. Then I felt great again, having become aware of the reason and dealt with it. Feeling temporary brief dysthymia is not always a bad thing. It was a good thing in that circumstance and it might be for you in our listening family too.

REGRESSION = Lots of my clients who I have seen for med checks but brief therapy once every few months for 10-15 years have done great that long, but we all still have a tendency to REGRESS to some extent to seeing life and ourselves and our roles like we saw them in childhood when we visit parents and sibs on the holidays or other events (weddings, etc.) and then are surprised we may feel worse temporarily after the holiday and not even know why. I warn my clients as I see them in Nov and Dec to watch out for that and I explain this to them. That way they catch themselves and avoid it, or sometimes need to avoid obnoxious parents who are always verbally abusive. To feel guilty for staying out of contact or limiting contact with chronically abusive parents is false guilt. We should feel guilty if we subject ourselves and our families to that instead. “Honoring your father and mother” in the Bible doesn’t mean letting them dominate or abuse you. It might mean having no contact with them but pitching in financially with other sibs to help pay for a nursing home when they are old, or it may involve doing nothing but avoiding or assisting them altogether.
PTSD SYMPTOMS MAY OCCUR ANNUALLY EVEN WHEN GONE THE REST OF THE TIME. If there is a past traumatic event of any kind or even strong regret that has not been adequately dealt with, each year near that anniversary date any person might experience more anxiety and sadness and not know why. Even nightmares that are difficult to understand, or more sensitivity. A person MIGHT be aware of what it is and feel bad each year or MIGHT NOT even be aware of what it is. For example, people who believe abortion is OK for personal reasons often feel sad annually at the time it occurred, often unconsciously, and may even look around at kids of the age that child would be had he or she been born and have conscious or unconscious regrets or guilt feelings. This is part of what is known psychiatrically as POST-ABORTION SYNDROME.

UNRESOLVED GRIEF. Anniversaries of major losses, like death of a child or significant other. Broken relationships. Divorce is often more traumatic than the death of a beloved mate. It is a rude awakening that the mate was not who you thought he or she really was. It is a willful rejection of you rather than an unexpected death.

“Hindsight” – Seeing Clearly Through the Veil of Deception

Join us for a riveting talk with Rhonda Madge, author of the book Hindsight: Seeing Clearly Through the Veil of Deception. In this podcast, Rhonda delves into the murder of her father at the vulnerable age of 17. Trying to cope with the death of such an important figure in her young life set in motion a downward chain of events. Rhonda describes living in “darkness for 20 years” where she started believing in “whispered lies”, never really dealing with the grief of her father’s death. She takes us through that journey and how she ended up on the other side.

Rhonda is an author, speaker and blogger and can be found at: https://rhondamadge.com/. Her book is a must read!

Episode 11 – Meet Carolyn Reinach Wolf, Family-Focused Mental Health Attorney and Advocate

Today we celebrate Carolyn Reinach Wolf, an executive partner in the law firm of Abrams Fensterman, and director of the firm’s mental health law practice. Profiled by the NY Times and a regular contributor to Psychology Today, Carolyn shares her passion and dedication to helping the mentally ill and their loved ones. You may email inquiries directly to Ms. Reinach Wolf at the following email: CWolf@abramslaw.com

Episode 10 -The Waiting Room of Winter – Bipolar BLAHS and How to Move Forward

The Holidays have snapped, crackled and popped… the New Year (HALLELUJAH) is upon us… and we feel, well, uninspired. Call it creepy covid overload, call it WTF is going on with our world, call it whatever you wish! The bottom line is this; the unknown, braided with lack of sunlight and chemical imbalance is a recipe for emotional shutdown, whether mentally ill or not! Today, join me in the 2020 waiting room (a nod to Fugazi). We WILL get through this! – A. Grieme

“I Will Love You For However Long…”

In today’s podcast, we interview Rachel, a foster mom who has opened her home to many children over the years. Rachel delivers a powerful example of selfless love as she talks about the rewards and challenges of being a foster parent. In a world where countless children need a loving home, Rachel lives by the philosophy that “they need to attach more than anything I need”. She expertly describes the keys to successful foster parenting and emphasizes that the children she has cared for taught her far more than she ever taught them.

Rachel is a Social Worker and is foster mom to a 8 month old, 13 year old and 18 year old. She relishes time with what she refers to as her “sweet little family”.

Amy Newmark – *New Book Alert* Chicken Soup for the Soul – Think Positive for Preteens and Think Positive for Teens

Today we welcome back, guest Amy Newmark! As Editor-In-Chief and Publisher of Chicken Soup for the Soul, she introduces her two latest additions to the Chicken Soup collection, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Think Positive for Teens and Chicken Soup for the Soul: Think Positive for Preteens. Amy gives listeners a glimpse into some of the inspirational stories in these two amazing books that are geared toward topics teens and preteens are struggling with today. Every young person needs these in their stockings this year!!

Amy is credited with revitalizing the Chicken Soup for the Soul brand, which has been a publishing industry phenomenon since the first book came out in 1993. By compiling inspirational and aspirational true stories curated from ordinary people who have had extraordinary experiences, Amy has kept the twenty-seven-year-old Chicken Soup for the Soul brand fresh and relevant.

Follow Amy on Twitter @amynewmark and look for books and more at: www.chickensoup.com

One Foot In Heaven – The miraculous true story of Sheila Preston Fitzgerald

Author of One Foot in Heaven, Sheila Preston Fitzgerald joins us for this inspiring conversation. In this podcast, Sheila talks about the fateful night when a tragic motorcycle accident changed the course of her life forever. What began as a near death experience, and grueling medical journey, turned into a hope-filled story of grit, determination and soul searching. Listeners will fall in love with Sheila’s attitude and are left wanting to know more about the miraculous events that brought her face to face with God. At a time when we all need a little inspiration, Sheila’s jaw dropping story is balm to the soul.

When she’s not speaking about her journey or writing; Sheila enjoys life to the fullest with her “tribe” of friends and family. Sheila resides in the beautiful, rolling hills just south of Nashville, Tennessee. She can be found at: www.OneFootInHeavenOnline.com and her book is available on Amazon.

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