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Tag: fear

Decide Who and How You Want to Be – TPS453

A lot of business people, including those who are successful, often deal with stress, overwhelm, and worry. My goal has always been to be able to run my business without stress and to experience ongoing peace of mind. In this episode, I discussed how to achieve this state of peace of mind.

Highlights

It takes a while to decide who you are, who you want to be, and what you want to do with your life.
When you reach a place of peace, you’ll be happier, healthier, and more productive without pushing yourself.
You have to learn how to “read” the inner signals that help you discriminate between what you need and what you don’t need.
If your goal is to experience success and peace of mind, you have to make the decision to do that.
The question isn’t what do you want to do, but who do you want to be.
Are you aware of the emotions that are driving you?
The difference between happiness and contentment is the corresponding brain chemicals.
Is it possible to live in a state of gratitude, acceptance, and satisfaction?
I was guided to learn to experience equanimity rather than getting hyper-excited about what was going on in my life.
You can train yourself to be in that state of equanimity, which allows you to live your life without stress.
Peace of mind requires a habit of acceptance and satisfaction and getting there, requires being aware of the habitual emotions that keep you from getting there.
This requires practicing and developing self-awareness and deciding what you want to be feeling instead of what you’re feeling now.
You have many different aspects of your personality. It takes a while to recognize which one of your aspects you’re being at any moment.
The system that I teach is about developing new responses to familiar stimuli so that things that normally trigger you no longer do.
One of the ways of becoming aware of your current emotional responses is through your money. I explain.
Start noticing the kinesthetic experience in your body any time you’re dealing with money. Do you feel contracted or expanded?
You can decide how you want to feel.
What will it take for you to be okay in this moment?

Links
TPS episode on Empathetic Detachment

The Hacking of the American Mind by Robert H Lustig, M.D., MSL

To set up an appointment to talk to me click here

REPLAY: Daniel Z. Lieberman, M.D: Dopamine Is About So Much More Than Pleasure

Daniel Z. Lieberman is the author of The Molecule of More: How a Single Chemical in Your Brain Drives Love, Sex, and Creativity?and Will Determine the Fate of the Human Race. He is a professor and vice chair for clinical affairs in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at George Washington University,  a Distinguished Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association, and a recipient of the Caron Foundation Research Award. In addition to writing science books, he works with patients, teaches medical students, and does behavioral research.

Highlights

All of our wealth comes from new ideas, so it helps to understand how the brain works.
Lieberman talks about the basics of why dopamine is so important.
Dopamine is so much more than just the pleasure molecule.
Dopamine is not about contentment or satisfaction because those emotions don’t stimulate us to seek more. Dopamine is the transmitter of anticipation.
People who have highly active dopamine systems are more likely to be entrepreneurs, artists, and to suffer from mental illness.
Dopamine leads to pleasure, but not happiness or satisfaction. That comes from other brain chemicals.
We talk about the reward prediction error and how it can lead to disappointment.
Some people go into things with low expectations. With low expectations, you are apt to get more positive feelings when things work out well.
If you always expect the best, you are bound to be disappointed.
Dopamine always pushes towards more.
People have to decide what they want out of life.
People who are highly dopaminergic aren’t happy or satisfied, but the rest of us profit from their dissatisfaction.
Artists are driven more by meaning than happiness.
We talk about entrepreneurs and their constant desire for more.
It’s not true that you can have it all. You have to make choices.
Once we understand how our brains work, we can make better choices.
We talk about addiction, the power of cravings, and how to overcome cravings.
Understanding how brains work helps you understand and tolerate others.

Links
www.DanielZLieberman.com

www.TheMoleculeOfMore.com

Herbert Lang: From Globetrotter to Kindness Ambassador – TPS454

Herb “Flight Time” Lang is an 18-year former player and coach with the World-Famous Harlem Globetrotters who is now a speaker, entrepreneur, motivator, and author. Throughout his travels, to nearly 90 countries with the Globetrotters, some of Herb’s most memorable

moments include meeting Pope Francis, President Obama, and appearing on numerous national television commercials and reality TV shows—most notably CBS’s “The Amazing Race.” He currently resides in Sacramento, California, where he is the proud father of two, and continues to make a difference through kindness and his life experiences, which he believes are the keys to maximizing what we get out of life. He is a true believer in that we are all rich with love and kindness. “Kindness Is Free!”
Highlights

Herb tells us how he was surrounded by kindness as a child and how that affected him.
He also shared what he went through physically to become one of the Harlem Globtrotters.
We talk about how his background taught him how to survive being a celebrity. He said it was important for him to never forget where he came from.
Some of the things that have given me the most pain are the things I’ve learned the most from. It taught me resilience.
“The feedback I get from others is what keeps me going.”
Herb’s positive mindset has inspired others. Being around a bunch of older people is what helped him develop the positive mindset along with his high-school basketball coach.
With the work he’s doing now, Herb is trying to teach young people how to develop kindness.
Look into a young person’s eyes and feed them all the things that you’ve learned along the way.
Things aren’t as bad as you think they are.
It takes support for us to achieve our dreams. Reach out to others.
I asked him how he deals with “the downs”. Now, he meditates and goes for daily walks. He also takes his mind back to “the kid me” where he had all his dreams.
We talk about “the wall” that often surrounds people of wealth and celebrity. Herb doesn’t have that wall.
Kindness is within all of us. We just have to let it out.
It bothers me when I see people who had a difficult childhood and now they’re doing the same things to their kids. I can only understand it and show them another way.
We are all children at heart.
The world is not a bad place.
My purpose is to do the best I can while I’m here.

Links
Herb’s book: Projects Popes and Presidents: An Inspirational Journey That Shows How You Can Overcome Life’s Obstacles and Achieve Your Dreams

Herb’s Website: www.Herblang.com

Facebook: www.facebook.com/herbertflighttime.lang

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/themotivationalspeaker/

 

How Feeling Sorry for Yourself Affects Your Life Outcomes – TPS451

In this episode, I share a recent experience that led to a major AHA. I recognized a habitual emotion that has been with me and has affected my life for a very long time. I think a lot of you will relate to this.

Highlights

I review my basic theory about how habitual emotions are the creative force behind our life stories.
Once I realized that I had a habit of feeling sorry for myself, I looked at all the times in my life it had affected decisions I had made even though I wasn’t aware that I was feeling sorry for myself.
I have learned not to judge myself because of things I have done in the past and decisions I have made.
It takes time and practice to develop a facility with recognizing your emotions and how they affected you in the past.
Along the line, I came to understand that in order to get healthy I had to change my persona – without realizing how long that would take.
I think that the best way to get to the core of why you do what you do is to understand not only the thoughts and beliefs that go into your decision-making but also to understand the emotions behind every decision you make.
One of the things I decided to do was to learn how to let go of negative self-talk.
How often do you feel sorry for yourself?
Comparing yourself to others will often allow you to feel sorry for yourself.
Lots of successful people never reach the levels they think they ought to and even though they have a lot, they still feel sorry for themselves.
It’s not that easy to make the necessary changes by yourself.

Links
Hacking the American Mind: The Science Behind the Corporate Takeover of Our Bodies and Brains by Robert H. Lustig

If you’d like help moving your life in a more satisfying direction, click here to set up an appointment to talk to me.

Dana Pharant: How She Uses Intuition to Guide Her Success – TPS450

Having built a 7-figure business without sales calls and as a former dominatrix, Dana Pharant knows all about owning her power and being unique. She has worked with clients for over 25 years, helping them keep their head out of their ass so they can scale with ease. She is the author of five books, winner of multiple awards and a woman who treats her own personal development like an extreme sport.

Highlights:

Dana Pharant was brought up in a cold and also went through all kinds of abuse. When she left the cult at 18, she went on a healing journey. She explains how her time as a dominatrix was part of her healing journey.
In the work that she does now, Dana uses her experience to help empower her clients.
We talk about how women can often have the fantasy of dominating, although Dana says that many men and women want to let go and be submissive.
A dominatrix is a high-level service position. Dana explains.
We talk about the difference between power and control and the different ways that leaders express their power. It’s about ‘power with’ rather than ‘power over’.
Power comes from letting go. In order to be able to let go, it’s essential that you understand why you need to be in control.
For the women that Dana works with, there can be a real fear of letting go of control. Dana talks about the shift in mindset that women have to go through in order to let go.
I asked Dana to explain how she helps people understand the difference between feminine and masculine power. Making the shift is a matter of reprogramming the brain.
Dana shares some techniques she uses to help people trust their intuition including how to ask your body what it needs.
When you let yourself be who you really are, you get a sense of profound freedom.
We talk about the value of letting your intuition guide your creative process.
Men and women access their intuitive inspiration differently.
People are becoming more accepting of some of the “woo” ideas about energy.
Dana is very grounded and uses the term “practical woo”.
We talk about letting go and allowing our businesses to take shape rather than pushing to make things happen.

Links:
Dana Pharant’s Site

For a free download of Dana’s book, go to www.BadAssIntuition.com

Facebook Page

Dana Pharant on LinkedIn

Peace of Mind, No Matter What’s Happening – TPS449

During these uncertain times, it’s difficult for people to experience a sense of equanimity – where you can maintain calm no matter what’s going on. Our brains are wired to warn us of danger when things are uncertain. In this episode, I talk about how you can develop some calm in the midst of the chaos.

Highlights

It’s possible to train yourself to maintain calm during times of chaos if you’re willing to listen to your inner voice and follow its instructions.
We can do better in our business and financially if we let go of our attachment to the outcomes.
If I’m setting goals based on what I know from the past, I’m not leaving room for new information and opportunities to come to me.
If you are skeptical and don’t trust others or yourself, it’s going to be hard for you to be able to draw in what you want and need.
Letting go and trusting is important if you want to find your true pathway.
If you’re trying to get back to what we had before Covid, it’s not going to happen. So much in our lives is changing – and will continue to change as the story evolves.
It’s important to develop ways of centering yourself and bringing yourself back to the current moment.
The idea is to minimize your fear and wait to see what shows up – and there will be some scary moments as we move towards the new reality.
How willing are you to believe that what’s happening now is to your advantage?
Are you prepared to die? If you take care of all the details, then you can let go of some of your fear of death.
If you are afraid of getting Covid or afraid of dying, then you need to do something about it so the fear doesn’t take up a whole lot of your thinking time.
Fear of not having enough money is actually the fear of dying.
I talk about how to deal with the fear of running out of money.

To be peaceful all the time, there are certain skills you have to develop.
Links
If you would like some guidance about how you can reach a point of inner peace, set up an appointment to talk to me by clicking here.

Lisa Levy: Helping Small Businesses Grow and Thrive – TPS448

Lisa L. Levy is the bestselling author of Future Proofing Cubed and Founder and CEO of Lcubed Consulting, a business that helps organizations elevate through strategic goal achievement. She and her team teach the practice of rapid adaptive transformation to notable global, multi-billion-dollar clients.

Lisa is a frequent guest expert on multiple media outlets and speaker at business executive conferences. On her rare days off, she enjoys spending time at her home in Arizona with her family and hound dogs.
Highlights

Lisa talks about how her company switched from working with very large companies to smaller companies.
The Adaptive Transformation Framework helps smaller businesses grow.
Lisa started working in corporate but realized she needed to be more creative and moved towards entrepreneurship.
Her experience in corporate helped create the system she uses.
Large corporations are only 10% of the businesses in the US.
The system that Lisa uses engages everyone within the organization and helps them adapt to change.
Lisa explains how the system she uses works with her mostly left-brain clients, but she is aware of the necessity of developing right-brain skills that lead to creativity and innovation.
Future Proofing Cubed – Lisa’s book – came to be during the pandemic when businesses had to adapt to new ways of doing things. By using the Adaptive Transformation Framework, business leaders can better adapt to change and thrive during difficult times.
Lisa is developing her ability to use emotions as part of business building.
You can teach people business skills, but their attitude and how they show up is also important.
Lisa has a core group of partners she works with so that she can bring in expertise from all fields to her clients.
We talk about the importance of collaboration.
When you open to other people, you expand yourself and become stronger.

Links
Lisa’s site

Future Proofing Cubed: The Definitive Guide to Improving Productivity, Refining Processes, and Bolstering Profitability

The C-Suite Network

Aprille Janes: Take a Chance and Let Life Unfold – TPS447

After a successful career as an I.T. consultant to Fortune 500 companies, Aprille Janes removed her “corporate suit” to follow a more creative path. Today she lives in Nova Scotia, Canada, painting and teaching in her studio overlooking the Bay of Fundy.

Highlights

Aprille shares the Canadian view of what’s happening now in the United States.
When Aprille left corporate, she and her husband were willing to take a chance and let their future unfold. She shares how they dealt with the uncertainty and talks about the synchronistic things that happened.
The process Aprille went through learning to trust her inner direction.
Skill and intuition have to be combined to develop inspired creation.
Aprille’s path has been one of exploration without having a definite end in mind.
We all have pain, we just choose whether we suffer.
Living a quiet, peaceful life, couldn’t have happened for Aprille when she was younger.
We need the contrast between light and dark.
Does it take time – and years of experience – to reach a point of acceptance?
The Covid pause is allowing us to reevaluate what’s important to us.
This is a time of choice – which side do you want to be on?
The chaos of the “insurrection” was a definite wake-up call for a lot of people.
Most of the people outside of the United States who are watching what’s going on are praying that democracy stands.
People are ready to be heard.
Fear of the unknown will paralyze us; trust lets us keep going.
We talk about the value of gratitude. What can you be thankful for today?
A lot of the conflict we’re seeing now is caused, in part, by feelings of powerlessness. Seeing that we have choices as to how we respond gives us back our power.

Links
Aprille’s site

An interview with Aprille after she moved to Nova Scotia

Aprille’s Facebook Page

David Howitt: Combining Spirituality with Business – TPS446

David M. Howitt is the founder & CEO of Meriwether Group and author of Heed Your Call is an inspiring thought leader and accomplished entrepreneur. David has over twenty years of experience providing financial, strategic, and brand counseling to early stage, and Fortune 100 companies. He has the unique ability to integrate vision and growth strategies with mission and purpose.

Highlights

David is a big fan of Joseph Campbell and The Hero’s Journey.
As a young boy, David had the urge to explore beyond the limited world he knew but avoided following that urge to explore. After getting married, having children, and working for years as an attorney, he knew he had to move in a new direction.
The business owners that David works with are able to integrate their spiritual lives with their business. He talks about the power of and rather than the power of or.
We talk about what it is that allows one person to move out of the “abyss” and move forward rather than staying stuck where they have been.
When you let go of what you think you should be and discover who must be that’s when synchronicity can happen and unexpected doors will open for you.
When he interviewed hospice workers, the number one regret that they heard from people on their deathbed was that they lived the life that other people wanted them to live.
There is a paradigm shift happening where younger people are beginning to understand that they don’t have to suffer to be considered a productive member of society. They are more interested in experiences than acquiring more things.
Sometimes we have to follow the wrong path to discern what the right path for us is.
We repair the world by following the “breath of God” that resides within us.
The question is, “How do we create the world that we really want?”
David talks about how the Meriwether Group helps people discover how they can become co-creators of their perfect life and lead from a place of intentionality.
We are now seeing the integration of Eastern and Western philosophy, of left brain and right brain, of artistry and analytics and that the magic happens with the integration of the ashram and the boardroom.
The beauty is in letting go.

Links:

David’s Site www.meriwethergroup.com

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/meriwethergroup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/david-howitt-09306a59/

Conscious Synchronicity – TPS445

This past Sunday, I gave a talk at The Celebration, the spiritual group I belong to and thought you might like to hear it. I’ve been interested in the idea of synchronicity for a long time and I shared some of my thoughts about it in this episode.

If you have stories about your experience with synchronicity, I’d love to hear about them. You can email them to Joan at ProsperityPlace.com.

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